The Prodigal Son corrected for Ecumenism, The Universal Solvent of Tradition (TM)

Luke 15

And he said: A certain man had two sons: And the younger of them said to his father: Father, give me the portion of substance that falleth to me. And he divided unto them his substance.  And not many days after, the younger son, gathering all together, went abroad into a far country: and there wasted his substance, living riotously.  And after he had spent all, there came a mighty famine in that country; and he began to be in want.  And he went and cleaved to one of the citizens of that country. And he sent him into his farm to feed swine.
 And he would fain have filled his belly with the husks the swine did eat; and no man gave unto him.  And returning to himself, he said: How many hired servants in my father' s house abound with bread, and I here perish with hunger?  I will arise, and will go to my father, and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven, and before thee: I am not worthy to be called thy son: make me as one of thy hired servants.  And rising up he came to his father. And when he was yet a great way off, his father saw him, and was moved with compassion, and running to him fell upon his neck, and kissed him.
 And the son said to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven, and before thee, I am not now worthy to be called thy son.  And the father said to his servants: Bring forth quickly the first robe, and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet: And bring hither the fatted calf, and kill it, and let us eat and make merry:  Because this my son was dead, and is come to life again: was lost, and is found. And they began to be merry.Now his elder son was in the field, and when he came and drew nigh to the house, he heard music and dancing:
 And he called one of the servants, and asked what these things meant.  And he said to him: Thy brother is come, and thy father hath killed the fatted calf, because he hath received him safe.  And he was angry, and would not go in. His father therefore coming out began to entreat him. And he answering, said to his father: Behold, for so many years do I serve thee, and I have never transgressed thy commandment, and yet thou hast never given me a kid to make merry with my friends:  But as soon as this thy son is come, who hath devoured his substance with harlots, thou hast killed for him the fatted calf.
 But he said to him: Son, thou art always with me, and all I have is thine.  But it was fit that we should make merry and be glad, for this thy brother was dead and is come to life again; he was lost, and is found.


The Prodigal Son corrected for Ecumenism, The Universal Solvent of Tradition

And he said: A certain man had two sons: And the younger of them said to his father: Father, give me the portion of substance that falleth to me. And he divided unto them his substance.  And not many days after, the younger son, gathering all together, went abroad into a far country: and there wasted his substance, living riotously.  And after he had spent all, there came a mighty famine in that country; and he began to be in want.  And he went and cleaved to one of the citizens of that country. And he sent him into his farm to feed swine.
And he would fain have filled his belly with the husks the swine did eat; and no man gave unto him.  And returning to himself, he said: How many hired servants in my father's house abound with bread, and I here perish with hunger?  I will arise, and will go to my father, and say to him: Father, even though I apostasised and left my family yet I am always your son and you have not yet done enough for me.
I have followed my conscience and chosen what I think is right. And rising up he came to his father. And when he was yet a great way off, his father saw him, and was moved with compassion, and running to him fell upon his neck, and kissed him.
And the father said to his servants: Bring forth quickly the first robe, and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet: And bring hither the fatted calf, and kill it, and let us eat and make merry in a new Lord's Supper for we want to have our son feel at home who left our family for another family but has always remained part of our family.
And they began to be merry. Now his elder son was in the field, and when he came and drew nigh to the house, he heard music and dancing: And he called one of the servants, and asked, "T'Hell is that racket?" And he said to him: Thy brother is come, and thy father hath killed the fatted calf, because he hath received him safe.  And he was angry, and asked why the Traditions were changed.
His father therefore coming out began to entreat him. And he answering, said to his father: Behold, for so many years do I serve thee, and I have never transgressed thy commandment, and yet thou hath destroyed the Tradition so my unfaithful brother who ran away would feel comfortable
But he said to him: Son, thou art always with me, and all I have is thine, except for the Real Mass and Sacraments and Sacred Theology.  But it was fit that we should change everything because you were the cause of his apostasy because your are a Pharisee who loves rules so make merry and be glad before your brother, whom we darest not ask to repent, will soon return to his new family where they will help him to attain unto Salvation whereas you must do penance for you are a Pelagian Restorationist, and you are a slave of superficiality, a little monster, nostalgic for structures and customs which are no longer life-giving and you are causing pain and disruption in our family and so you are considered now only in partial communion with our family whereas your lost brother is in communion with our family.