I wouldn't touch a cliche with a ten foot pole is the fourth track to be heard on Amateur Brain Surgeon’s debut album, Shootin it, an original collection of the puissant poetry of Amateur Brain Surgeon set to song.
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouldn’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
You don’t have a leg to stand on, welcome to my Hell
That’s not your Mother’s little helper but the farmer in the dell
Look at him he’s hornier than a rabid peach orchard boar
Were you brought up in a barn, close the frigging door
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouln’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
Shit out of luck, you can take that to the bank
I slave all day long, never get any thanks
Two heads are better than one, two ships passing in the night
Two left feet, two wrongs don’t make a right
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouldn’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
Wam bam thank you mam, what a tangled web we weave
Watch that wizard closely he’s got something up his sleeve
That dog won’t hunt, loose lips sink ships, just go with the flow
what a zoo, for Heaven’s sake, it’s not who you know but blow
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouln’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
Thank your lucky stars, that really chaps my hide
always call shot gun if you’re going for a ride
when will you ever act your age, stop acting like a clown
wave the white flag, a smile's just a frown turned upside down
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouln’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
Who left you in charge, where is the beef
Isn’t it about time you turned over a new leaf
I’ve got the world on a string, the worm has finally turned
You’ve got some nerve, a penny saved is a penny earned
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouldn’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
When pigs do fly, when push comes to shove
I’m in hog heaven, it fits like a glove
Trial by fire, tried and true, fit to be tied
she lies like a rug, works like a dog, Ut oh, the rabbit died
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouln’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
Chewing the fat,The sword is mightier than the pen
You can’t stop him just contain him, just say when
Thick as thieves.,Thick as a brick, Pure as the wind-driven snow
She’s got one in the oven, she gives off a golden glow
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down rabbit hole
and I wouldn’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
In for a penny in for a pound
you can’t tell your ass from a hole in the ground
Fit as a fiddle, Don’t cry over spilled milk
someday, baby, I’ll have you farting through silk.
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouldn’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
Brave as a lion, weak as a kitten
That sexy blonde has the poor boy smitten
going whole hog, work like a dog, sleep like a log
under the gun, when it rains it pours, two peas in a pod
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouldn’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
I'm cursed, the same bad things happen time after time
up at the crack off dawn, then its off to the damn salt mines
Off the pigs, a pig in a poke, a poke right in your eye
peach cobbler, shoo fly pie, your'e building castles in the sky
I'm cursed, the same bad things happen time after time
up at the crack off dawn, then its off to the damn salt mines
Off the pigs, a pig in a poke, a poke right in your eye
peach cobbler, shoo fly pie, your'e building castles in the sky
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouldn’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
A fool and his money is soon to be parted
It is silent but deadly, who'n'hell just farted
A fool on the hill, Bob's your uncle
is that your nose or a huge carbuncle
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
A fool and his money is soon to be parted
It is silent but deadly, who'n'hell just farted
A fool on the hill, Bob's your uncle
is that your nose or a huge carbuncle
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouldn’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
Don't count your chickens before they hatch
Don't throw me into that briar patch
It's gonna rain today wear your slickers
A short yellow bus with two window lickers
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouldn’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
Get a life, I gave him the finger
a stick up his ass, tits in a wringer
Pedal to the metal, cool as a cuke
What the Hell, you make me puke
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouldn’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
Keep a stiff upper lip, shoot from the hip
the rats are starting to abandon the ship
sing a song of six pence, polly wants a cracker
he’s a wanker slacker, he’s a fudge packer.
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouldn’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.
Lay it on the line, the guy’s got no spine
She’s a real looker, she’s so fine
he’s a clothes horse, she’s dressed to the hilt
He’s a trouble maker, he’s starting to wilt
Needless to say, Why buy the cow when the milk is free
What on God’s green earth is the matter with me
I wouldn’t chase an argument down a rabbit hole
and I wouldn’t touch a cliche with a ten foot pole.