This is what is wrong with America

Online Recipes, this is what is wrong with America.

If you are anything like ABS, and we pray you are not, you have had the irksome displeasure of clicking on a link to a recipe and, after reading it, you made the mistake of looking at the reviews and you read something like this in reaction to a perfectly fine recipe;

Tuscan-Herbed Potatoes was a winning recipe from the Allrecipes Allstars “Hot Potato!” cooking challenge, sponsored by Potatoes USA.

INGREDIENTS

• 1 lb. petite potatoes, quartered
• 8 white mushrooms, sliced
• 1/4 yellow onion, diced
• 1/2 red bell pepper, diced
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 2 Tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
• Sea salt and ground black pepper to taste
• 3 slices prosciutto
• 4 fresh basil leaves, chopped
• 2 teaspoons chopped fresh parsley
• 2 Tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese

PREPARATION 

Prep Time: 10min | Cook Time: 38min

1. Preheat oven to 450ºF
2. Line a baking sheet with non-stick aluminum foil.
3. Combine potatoes, mushrooms, onion, red bell pepper, garlic, olive oil, salt, and pepper in a large bowl until evenly coated. Spread potato mixture onto the prepared baking sheet.
4. Roast in the preheated oven for 15 minutes. Remove baking sheet from oven, stir potato mixture, and continue roasting until potatoes are crisp, about 20 minutes more.
5. Place prosciutto in a skillet over medium-high heat; cook and stir until slightly crisp, 3 to 4 minutes. Transfer prosciutto to a cutting board and chop.
6. Top potato mixture with prosciutto, basil, parsley, and Parmesan cheese.

Reviews;

I was so excited when I read this recipe that I told my husband, (who shall go nameless) "I'm gonna make this right now."

And I did.

I did make a change or two and I have to say I think my changes resulted in a dish far tastier and way healthier than your original recipe probably tastes (Did I mention I did not make this unhealthy dish?)

Instead of potatoes, I thought it would be much healthier to substitute bananas and I was lucky enough to have a bunch at home.

Instead of salt, I used a salt substitute, and I completely eliminated prosciutto which is very unhealthy.

I think it goes without saying that cheese is also an unhealthy choice as it tends to bind us up and who wants to go around all day with ten or fifteen extra pounds of toxic sludge cluttering up their colon?

In any event, for our Saturday evening meal,  I just ended up roasting the bananas with their peels on and then I scraped off all of the so-called fruit on the inside and served only the peels because that is where all the vitamins are as one can easily see during feeding time at the zoo. 

My gosh, go to a zoo at feeding time and watch a chimpanzee eat a banana and in like five minutes he is going ape.

Anywho, when I served the peels to what's-his-name that was the very moment he decided to leave me but I am much skinnier and happier now that he has left me and if anyone reading this is lonely, please click on my name and we can meet at the Kale and Quinoa Counter at the local Whole Foods Store.

Ima Hoar, Silver Springs, Maryland.

P.S. I forgot to tell you about the vegetables. I put them into a small plastic container, one without the BPA, of course, and saved them to put in my breakfast salad.

O, and one more thing. If you try and call to arrange for a meeting at the Kale and Quinoa Counter, please know that I will not be available from 4:30 - 9:00 am because I will be in a spinning class.

After that, I eat a lunch salad of lettuce and ice chips and then I go to my Yoga Class with my very handsome teacher, Sri Ovanmitts.  To tell you the truth, I can almost feel his eyes burning a hole in my yoga pants when I am doing the Cow but my friends say he doesn't even have the first clue I am alive.

I like to think off myself as Udderly sexy. OK, sorry; that was a bad joke.

Anyways, thanks for listening and thanks for the recipe. Peace and love everyone...